It is your wedding day, you have on that beautiful dress, you walk down the aisle, you say your I do’s in front of all your family and friends, your so excited to be married. It is like a dream come true, happily ever after right?  WRONG!

Let’s be clear, marriage is not easy… if you don’t believe me look at the 50% divorce rate.

You have to be willing to do the work, but without good clear guidance it is easy to make mistakes.

All of us look through lenses of our own experiences, and whether we like it or not they are tainted. I have been married for 17 years, and I have spent the last 10 years working with children and families. I can’t tell you how many times I wanted to scream at the top of my lungs, say stop talking and listen…..

Things get turned around, people make assumptions based on past pains, or miscommunication and relationships are often torn to shreds, but there is a solution

I ran across Gary’s first book Sacred Marriage years ago when it was first released, and it changed me and my approach to my own marriage. Gary challenged us to think about marriage as a tool for making us better, making us more Christ like, and making us holy.

When he spoke it was like something popper, I heard and understood his words and I started to do things differently, and in this new book, A Lifetime Love, he has more insightful information to share.

[Tweet “What If Marriage Is About More Than Just Staying Together? @GaryThomas”]  Things that make you go hmmmmm

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Marriage requires maturity and often you find yourself becoming more and more mature with every mistake, if you are willing to LEARN and APPLY the lesson, but this takes time!

Gary Thomas, has been working with couples for years. He always has amazing insights and he challenges the way you look at relationships, in general. He gives you great opportunities to grow and to learn. He has a passion for helping people heal their relationships and he has a strong faith in God.

Gary challenges us to think about marriage differently. He gives us the pieces we need to put together more successful relationships with our spouses. He starts off by asking us to put our trust and willingness into God’s plan, and not our own. He shows why faith, trust, truth and love are so important in a relationship.

Most of all, he does a great job of showing us those “logs in our own eyes” and he gives us REAL TOOLS we can use to make personal improvements.  Gary leads with thought provoking questions, great examples, and encouragement.  He also doesn’t backdown from those challenges and hard questions that his readers are asking.

He asks us to stop comparing ourselves, and our marriages to the marriages of others.

He shares ways to improve intimacy.

He encourages you to see where your choices are hurting the other person, or undermining your relationship.

Most of all, he gives you what you need to rebuild and restructure your marriage so you can turn it into something you love and cherish, even if it’s not perfect right now.

Here are just a few of my favorite takeaways..(I have to do a whole new post because there are so many more I want to share, especially since this is such an important topic.)

[Tweet “”If my son in law (daughter in law) was treating my daughter (son) the way I am treating my wife, how would I feel?” – @GaryThomas”]

Our spouses are God’s children, what great perspective! We want to make God happy when He sees our treatment of our spouses. That is part of our worship to God how we treat each other, and how we follow Christ example.

[Tweet “Make eternally profitable choices. – @GaryThomas”]

Don’t get short sided by the NOW, ask yourself what kind of choice will reap the long-term reward that I want. Does this choice show my love & relationship with Christ? Does it show that I follow his teachings?

I highly recommend this book, it is an absolute must read.  This is a good book for people whether they are newly married, or married for years.  I also see this book being used with a church ministry for wives, husbands, or a marriage ministry.  There are so many rich nuggets, this is one of those books you could read over and over again, and still learn something new.

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Disclosure:  I was given this book to review by Propeller Consulting, LLC. who is also sponsoring the giveaway, but the opinions are my own.

Giveaway rules: Only one entry per address, per giveaway, if you have won this on another blog, you are not eligible to win it again.  Winner is subject to eligibility requirements.